You always and forever
I can't believe I have reached post Y. One more to go and I am done with the challenge. I still wonder how I managed to stick by and pull this off. I blogged and simultaneously did a doodle challenge of creating artistic letters (A to Z). And there is only one reason why I did this and why I could pull this off.
It is because of him. Toulouse. My pet, my love, my life, my soul. He changed it all after he left. He changed me. It's not even been two months since he has gone and I still cannot fathom it. I have accepted it but it has been the most difficult days of my life. I took up these challenges to give myself a purpose because since he has gone I have been lost. I have lost direction and nothing seems to make sense to me.
And for him I worked hard. For him I wrote all these articles. For him I stayed up and doodled all night. It is all for him. To find my footing again. And due to these challenges I got my energy back. I got the will to draw and write back. I got the will to work hard. I got the will to not give up. All for him.
Loss of someone you love shatters you. It rips you apart. You can never feel whole again. I am incomplete without him and will always be. Each day that passes it gets difficult and is tougher to cope which is funny since they say time heals you, but for some reason here time is not healing me at all.
But he beats in my heart. And I will carry him in me always and forever. Because whatever souls are made of, his and mine are the same. (My favorite quote of all time only for him and only him).
PS- Here is the Y doodle. Stay tuned for the last post.